I’ve watched this youtube video several times. Each time I am deeply stirred. I believe it is one of the most powerful and important videos ever produced. I encourage you to watch it and to ask Father how He wants you to respond to its message.
To keep in mind: Webster’s definition of catholic is “of, relating to, or forming the church universal; relating to, or forming the ancient undivided Christian church.” I respect my Roman Catholic brothers and sisters and join with them in taking a stand for life, but I also challenge all followers of Jesus Christ to remember that it is by our love the world will come to know Him.
Below is an article I wrote over 20 years ago that was published in Standard, Vista, and Lookout.
What About the Mom?
“More than one million abortions are performed in the United States each year!”
The young woman continued, with compelling conviction, to speak of the rights of the unborn child—the child created in God’s image. She cited Scripture and historical documents to prove her points and to show how, until the last two decades, the church had stood against abortion.
I was glad my church was taking a stand and that the pastor had invited this young woman to speak. I agreed with everything she was saying, but my heart cringed at the way she said it. I looked around trying to read the faces near me, but in my mind’s eye I only saw the face of a dear friend. I remembered the haunted look in her eyes.
“Can you have lunch with me?” she asked after the close of one of the weekly Bible studies I led. “I need to talk to someone.”
For the past few weeks Linda* had been unusually quiet and pale. I had been worried about her.
“I’d love to,” I replied. “But please don’t fuss.”
I didn’t need to worry. When we got to her house, I was amazed at the clutter. Linda always had been a fastidious housekeeper.
“What’s troubling you, Linda?” I asked. “You haven’t been yourself for weeks.”
Her eyes became even more haunted. “I—I haven’t told this to anyone,” she said. “Please promise me you won’t repeat it. I feel so awful for what I’ve done.” She began to sob.
I took her hands in mine. “Nothing you have done could be that awful,” I said.
“But it is! God will never forgive me. I’ll never forgive myself.”
Haltingly she told me how she hadn’t been feeling well. When she went to the doctor, she learned she was pregnant.
“After Susan* was born, Tom* and I decided three children were enough. We were taking precautions to prevent me getting pregnant again. But—but I was, and the doctor said it wasn’t a normal pregnancy. He recommended an abortion.”
I waited in silence as Linda struggled to control her sobs.
“I didn’t want to have one, but the doctor kept saying it was for the best—that my own health was being endangered. It was awful. Not just the physical pain, but the feeling that a part of me was being ripped from me. It wasn’t easy like he said it would be and—and it’s never going to be easy again. I can’t live with myself during the day or sleep at night. I want to die.”
“No, Linda. No you don’t,” I said trying to comfort her. “This time will pass. You’ll see.”
Linda just shook her head as tears continued to stream down her cheeks.
“You did what the doctor recommended. God knows that. He isn’t condemning you.”
“I killed my baby,” she sobbed. “How can God forgive me for that?”
I prayed with her and tried to assure her of God’s forgiveness. We talked for another hour but I’m not sure anything I said helped.
Linda never again mentioned the abortion. I could feel her shame and embarrassment. It was obvious she wished I’d just forget what she had told me. Eventually she moved and I lost touch with her. But I never forgot her.
My thoughts flashed back to the present. Were there other Linda’s in the congregation—women who had made the decision to abort based on a doctor’s recommendation? Were they still struggling with the guilt that had nearly destroyed Linda? And what of the ones who were victims of rape or incest? Or those who had been frightened unwed mothers?
I’ll probably never know how those words affected the women who were listening that day, but I do know how they affected me. I saw how I was guilty of using the same strong rhetoric as the speaker. In my crusade to save the lives of unborn babies, I had undoubtedly inflicted pain on the mothers who had aborted them. Instead of ministering comfort and hope, I, too, had spoken words of accusation and condemnation.
“God, forgive me,” I prayed. “Help me to care not just about the unborn baby but also about the mom—to love her as much as You do.”
_________________
*Names have been changed.
As Election day approaches, I believe it is critically important that we not be silent about the issues that concern us. Father, give us a holy boldness to be “biblically” rather than “politically” correct. Help us to speak and write words that are “gracious as well as sensible” (Col. 4:8 TLB) and that will draw our nation back to you.
Check out America for Jesus, “a national solemn assembly” in Philadelphia, September 28-29 – http://www.afj2012.org/
Wow, excellent point. My sister in law had an abortion a few years ago at the age of 15 and at the urging of her faither. Her mothers was against it. They stayed with me and my husband for the few days surrounding the procedure and I was overwhelmed with guilt having not “stopped” it. I spoke frequently with my mother in law, who was a professing Catholic and was also against it. But the two of us could not change the mind of the baby’s grandfather. Because of that situation, I too cringe at the harsh judgments of my fellow Christians, especially on social media. I speak up about abortion, and have likely said things that have offended people which I regret. However, knowing that my sister in law is a “friend” on social media reminds me to keep my speech graceful (though I most assuredly have failed at times). Thank you for posting this.
Father, as we seek to be salt and light and to do what is right, keep reminding us to love others as You love us.
I will never forget the girl sitting on the top row of my “religion” class in college. I had just completed my persuasive speech on anti-abortion. And I had done it well! Pictures of fetus’s at certain stages, the long term effects on women who had an abortion and my take on why abortion was murder. I was feeling rather smug! Until I look at that young lady and realize her shaking was silent sobs! That was in 1982 and I have never forgotten it. Many times over the years, I wish I had gone to her. If nothing else just to hug her and say I was sorry. I learned a valuable lesson that day. Still to this day, I am so careful on how I approach this subject.
“also, about the mom – to love her as much as you do.” Amen!!
Father, please forgive me for all the times I’ve not spoken the truth in love,
Dear friend and mentor and woman-of-great-empathy……..great insight and you are gifted in the ability to share. Yes! The individual woman has been pushed to the shadows in the spotlight of the abortion issue…..vs spontaneous miscarriage. Sometime we’ll share over a ‘cup of coffee’……blessings on you. Marie
Thanks so much for this Marlene. I too have often cringed at the tone we take in our crusade against abortion. I strongly agree that abortion on demand is morally and spiritually wrong and that women suffer for it in ways those who have never faced this decision will ever know. Compassion is so important when we engage the culture. I will never forget how tender Jesus was when he spoke to those who had sinned, and how cutting His words to those who were self righteousness. We have all fallen short of the glory of God.
Karen
So, so true, Karen. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you so much Marlene for speaking the truth in love…but you are right…we must speak our values through our vote. Gonna share this one.
Amen, Glenda. This is a critical election. Christians must become informed and vote their values.